Mary Martha Williams

October 4, 1938 – January 29, 2026

Mary Martha Williams passed away in her sleep at her assisted living home in Seattle on January 29. She was 87 years old and had lived with dementia for several years.

Mary was born at the tail end of the Great Depression, in Grand Junction, Colorado, and spent her early childhood in Fort Collins, where her parents raised her and her brother Brian. Mary spent her high school years in Port Washington, Long Island, where her father, Harry, had taken a job as an assistant superintendent of schools. Mary’s mother, Charlotte, was an early employee of Publisher’s Clearing House.

Mary found her true calling after receiving a nursing degree from the University of Michigan, returning to New York after graduation to work at Cornell Hospital. Those were not easy years. Even in 2026, Mary complained about the grueling shifts she had to work as a junior nurse at Cornell in the early 1960s and her discomfort at walking home in the wee hours through Manhattan’s gritty streets. 

Eventually, Mary headed west to San Francisco, where she began a long career as a nurse at UCSF. A highlight of that career occurred in the late 1970s and early 1980s, when Mary helped oversee UCSF’s hematology oncology clinic, which was then on the frontlines of the medical response to the AIDS epidemic under Dr. Paul Volberding and others. Some of Mary’s deepest friendships were forged with UCSF colleagues during that intense period.

Along with her career, Mary juggled the duties of being a single mother. Those were the days before helicopter parenting had been invented. The teenage years of her one and only child, Nick Wingfield, were slightly feral, which Mary mostly tolerated—at least until he came home with a particularly bad report card or a dented fender on her car. One of the surest ways to earn Mary’s disapproval as a parent was to feel sorry for yourself. Nick avoided that temptation at all costs.  

In the late 90s, Mary retired as a nurse, moving first to Marin County and then St. Helena in Napa County. She spent the next two decades embarking on an African safari, extended trips to England and many other adventures. She was an outstanding cook and loved nothing more than sharing a bottle of wine with friends. Her Caesar salad was legendary among her friends and mine. 

That recipe is as follows: 

• Romaine lettuce
• Homemade croutons. Slice bread (preferably day old) into cubes, toast in a skillet with generous amounts of pressed garlic and ample amounts of butter and olive oil, until golden or even slightly burned.
• Dressing. ¼ cup of light olive oil, 2-3 cloves of pressed garlic, 2 Tbsps. of fresh lemon juice, 3-5 anchovy fillets. Blend. 
• Toss all ingredients in a salad bowl, along with grated parmesan. 

After Covid, Mary left California to live closer to Nick, his wife Emily and Mary’s two grandchildren, Beatrice and Miller. Dementia gradually began to chip away at Mary’s memory. Mary loved receiving frequent visits from her family and friends.  

In these last years, Mary expressed no interest in discussing her own mortality. She never wavered from her no-regrets attitude. “I’ve had a good life,” she said not long ago. After being discharged from the hospital after a recent health issue, Mary settled into a bed in her room and declared: “I feel great.” The next morning she was gone.

Please consider making a Caesar salad in Mary’s honor.